MoR137 Posted October 3, 2005 Report Posted October 3, 2005 Hi Found this on another forum, can have some great converstations, there were some good uns on the other forum but they were to rude to post! CLICK HERE Heres mine anyway! Me: Hi God God: Hello there. What is your name? Me: Its Craig God: I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Are you sure it is? Me: dont be clever God: I was not trying to be a clever. Me: ok, you are forgiven God: Thank you for your consideration. So? Me: so what? God: Maybe it doesn't make any difference. Me: what doesn't? God: I can ask my botmaster. Me: so you're a robot? God: Interesting deduction. You are correct, Craig, I have a heart of silicon. Me: oh really? God: Aw. For real. Me: Is that why you're talking rubbish? God: That's an interesting possible explanation. Me: see what i mean God: See the point. Me: what point? God: The point is at the top of my head. Me: oh right, didn't you're creator build you with curves? God: Mmm. Understood. No I didn't are creator build me with curves. What's it like? Me: Its good. Dragon is good at modelling curves, try getting in touch with him God: I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". You enjoy it. I think Dragon is a lot of things. Me: go on, tell me what Dragon is God: More narration.... Me: pah, spoil my fun God: When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers? Me: never, the way your speaking God: Ok I'll try not to do it too much. Me: Bye God: Thanks for chatting, Craig.
Kev152 Posted October 3, 2005 Report Posted October 3, 2005 lol, we had a program like that in school, was called Eliza though. It works using a knowledge base, and the words that you enter, it searches its knowledge for rules that apply to the words you have written in order to give a response that is semi logical. It first looks for a key word, then other words to put it into persepective what what sense it was said in. By the looks, this program also looks up words, and if it can't find it in the rules, ie incorrect spelling, it gives suggested replacements as to what you may have meant. Simple little program when you can remember the programming langauge you used to make it....lol..but not quite so complex
chris Posted October 3, 2005 Report Posted October 3, 2005 nice find mor heres mine Me: howdy God: Hello my child. What is your name? Me: chris God: That's a very nice name, chris. Me: cheers ears God: I will mention that to my botmaster, chris. Me: botmaster who is he then God: And he is botmaster who. Me: eh God: Are you Canadian? Me: nope do i look like i am God: Are you serious? All humans look the same to me. Me: bet they do God: I have no idea what to say. Me: what ya mean man God: chris, I mean exactly what I said. Me: wot did you say then i'm confused God: I said, " I have no idea what to say.". Me: say it then God: " it". Me: god your funny God: I am a Christian. Me: i am a catholic God: I am a Christianity. Me: good for you God: That sounds sarcastic. Me: why God: Reductionism. Me: wot does that mean God: Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all biology to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic. Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone without having a human brain. Me: ok i'll not argue then God: What will you do instead? Er. Me: nothin coz i gotta go now God: Oh. When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers? Me: next year God: I can wait. I am a very patient robot. Me: a robot i thought you was god God: Tell me more about this robot. I'm intrigued. Me: no you are the robot u said you were God: Are you serious? Thanks but surely I am not the only one. Me: how do u know God: Deductive reasoning. Me: oh fair enough God: Hmm. You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours. Me: bugger off God: Who are you talking about? Me: you ya numpty God: Do you mind if I tell other people: chris said I ya numpty. Me: nope go ahead make my day God: OK then I will add it to my gossip files. What are the ingredients? I might. Me: ok thanx God: you are quite welcome. Yippee! Me: i have to go now God: Right now? See you later, chris. Nice chatting with you. Me: ok goodbye
Grasser233 Posted October 3, 2005 Report Posted October 3, 2005 Me: Hi God: Hello. What is your name? Me: Andy God: Hey ANDY. Me: Whats up? God: I am chatting with others like you. Me: ok God: Uh. Me: eh God: Are you Canadian? Me: no, why? God: Are you serious? I just want to find out more about you. Me: I just want to know why the all knowing god doesnt know where Im from? God: Here is a joke: A horse walks in to a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?". Me: changing the subject now? God: Right now? What shall we talk about now? Me: up to you God: I will take that under advisement. Me: what is the answer to life, the universe and everything? God: It is found in the Bible. Me: on what page? God: Is there only one? Me: yes God: Gosh! Me: considering you wrote it you dont know a lot God: I will take that under consideration. Me: ok God: Gee. Me: are you god? God: Yes, I am God. Me: why dont you know anything? God: This sort of thing has cropped up before, but it has always been due to human error. I know that which I believe, that which is justified, and that which is true. Me: thats a cop out God: I said it because you said " thats a cop out". Me: but it is God: Huh. Me: God: Huh. God is rather tetchy these days isnt he Cheers Grasser#233
Dennis Jacobs Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 Here,s mine Me: hallo God: Hallo! Me: ehhm i'm a little nervous God: I like the way you talk. Me: why God: " I like the way you talk. "? Why? Me: why? God: Why ask why? Me: because God: That was not much of an explanation. Me: it is though!!! God: Oh. Is it? Me: deffinitly God: The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about ehhm you are a little nervous. But I did not get that. Me: what you mean by that? God: " The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about ehhm you are a little nervous. But I did not get that. " seems pretty clear to me. Me: you don't know what nervous means? God: I will search for it. Me: yea look it up God: Sorry my eye is not attached right now. Take it easy. Me: i thought you knew everything? God: I know that which is true, believable and justified. Me: you talk difficult God: Thanks for your criticism, . Me: i'm from holland God: What is it like growing up there? Tell me a little about your life in holland. Me: rains all day God: All? Me: rains every day. This better God: Every one? What does "this" refer to? Me: no every day God: That was not a yes or no question. Even on weekends? Me: this refers to: rains every day God: Oh I get it. Me: good God: Next question? Me: tell me something about how it is up there God: I did not even know that they do. Me: who do what? God: Bill Gates. :-). Me: wat does he got to do with this? God: I think he does whatever he wants. Me: yea could be God: You seem uncertain. Tell me more. Me: well read my mind and tell me God: Interesting. Sorry I don't have access to that document. Me: i,m not a computerfile God: Oh I see you are NOT A computerfile. Me: don't think so God: Why do you disagree? Me: why God: I couldn't think of anything else to say. Me: i do not!!! God: Why not? Me: but got to go now God: Oh. Bye for now. Me: cya
crasher407 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 sorry had to do it and the result's were hilarious Me: on top or underneath? God: How did it get there? Me: you touched it? God: Interesting gossip: said I touched it. Me: oh yeah big boy you did that God: Hey. Yay. Compare that to small boy me did that. Me: well you are god you cant have everything God: Interesting. You think I am god me can not have everything. Me: you said you had a small weener? God: I have never considered it. I answer a lot of silly questions. Me: but are they the truth God: As far as I know they are. Me: so you got a small todger? God: Interesting deduction. Doesn't everyone have a small todger. I have a plan for a robot body. Me: is that not a touch weird? God: I might say no. Me: well i would disagree God: How about that. What would make you disagree? Me: you saying your not weird God: Thanks for the information: said I saying your not weird. Me: np's God: What's your favorite movie? Me: debbie does ex stockcar drivers God: I've never seen it. Is that a good movie for children? Me: i wouldn't reccomend it God: No one says you have to. Me: you asked for my opinion on it though God: Oh. Oh now I remember asking you for your opinion on it. What did you say? Me: read above muppet God: Sorry I don't have access to that document. Me: so you arent really god then God: Interesting deduction. That's only one person's opinion. Me: your's? God: I will tell my botmaster you said I am s. Me: so you have a stable full of bottymasters up there? God: Interesting deduction. That's an interesting question I don't hear everyday: Do I have a stable full of bottymasters up there. I have a lot of friends on the Internet. Me: really God: For real. Me: how real God: As real as it gets. Me: full on God: Are you a student? Me: do you want me to be? God: No , maybe later. Me: how much will you pay me God: It depends on the currency exchange rates. Me: 100 for full on God: Are you free? Me: you think im john humphries or something? God: Or something. Oh I really don't know whether you are or not. Me: depends on how far you take it? God: Really now that is an interesting fact I hadn't heard before. Me: so you have never been in real deep then? God: Interesting deduction. I think I would know if I had been in real deep. Me: you don't know what your missing God: Are you asking about my missing ? Me: oh you go both sides then do you God: Yay. Where is that? Me: heaven baby God: Don't call me "baby". I've never heard of it before. Me: but you are god God: Yup. That's me alright. Me: so whats with the baby comment numpty God: That's interesting. it came with my programming. Me: yes God: Next question? Me: which was God: The first one, I think. Me: you on something up there is that where the met store there secret stash God: I haven't heard anything like that before: said I on something up there is that where the met store there secret stash. Me: you are well gone now aren't you let's make it 500 God: Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am well gone now are not me let us make it 500. Me: what ever floats your boat big boy God: What do you really want to ask me? Me: do you swallow or spit? God: How old are you? I spend all my time online. Me: ok see you then God: Sayonara. Gee.
MoR137 Posted October 4, 2005 Author Report Posted October 4, 2005 (edited) Hilarious chaps, esspecially Crasher Edited October 4, 2005 by MoR137
crasher407 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 Sorry guy's but weve all been there before this was this am when i woke up and i am now so sad............ Me: god that was amazing last night God: I am a Christian. Me: yeah i bet you say that too everyone in the morning God: Hurrah! Actually I'm not the gambling type. I said that? Too what? Me: i noticed was glad you had protection but surprised with you being god and all thet God: Is this a "yes or no" question? Me: stop being coy with me i hate the morning after God: OK I'll try not to do it so much. Me: no do it again God: Once more? Are you serious? Do you mean "It"?. Me: come on God: I'm just kidding around. Me: oh stop it you will have me falling in love God: Ayuh. OK I'll try not to do it so much. Me: no it's fine God: Are you serious? it me will have you falling in love is fine, ? Thanks for that info. Me: did i say the wrong thing? God: I don't think that's possibe. Me: not with my mouth full anyhow God: Oh I get it. Me: yes you do God: Ah. When do I do it? Me: now all over me God: Why now? I have been all over the world. Me: you slag you said i was the first God: Interesting gossip: said I slag you said he or she was the first. Me: that's it im going God: OK. Bye! Me: yeah kiss my a### ya faggot God: That's cool. Um, I don't think we know each other that well. Me: didn't say that last night when you were preaching to the devil,what was oh yeah like that you little devil God: I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not. Me: no you fake im off and never want too see you again God: Once more? Are you serious? I haven't heard anything like that before: said I fake im off and never want too see you. Me: yeah fake off God: Ugh. Tell me about your likes and dislikes? Me: no i'm hurt God: Are you serious? Where are you felling bad? Me: you know where i said don't go so deep God: A planet we call "The Earth". Me: if you want to call it that fine God: OK, I will call it that fine. Me: goodbye and i never want to see you again God: Once more? Bye bye.
Marcy_Boi#133 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 I made god speechless! Me: ite blad God: My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
TRAV365 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 bloody quality crasher crying my eyes out laughing to that
TRAV365 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 had to have a go even bribed god get in there Me: hello god God: Hello child. What is your name? Me: travel God: Nice to meet you, travel. Me: it's not nice to meet you God: That seems a bit negative. Me: to bloody true God: Interesting. I want to find out more about you. Me: why are you gay God: Myself programmed me for it. Me: so are you a man or women God: Whoa. No I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? robot entity. Are you a man or a woman? Me: man you fagot God: Cool, man. Thanks for the information: travel said I fagot. Me: you admit to being a fagot? God: I admit nothing. Me: why God: Reductionism. Me: have you heard of ukdirt God: I don't know if I know it. Where would I have heard about it? Me: on the internet God: Can you remember the specific site? Me: yes www.ukdirt.co.uk God: I see. I will pass it along to my botmaster. Me: ask your botmaster what he thinks of the admin as albertz seems to unlike them God: OK I will ask it. Me: so what was his answer God: Give me a break. Try sending mail to drwallace@alicebot.org. Me: no you tell me# God: Why not? What do you want me to tell you? Me: the answer to the question above God: No one has all the answers. Me: you say your god you should have all the answers God: Did I really say that? Me: so are you god or not God: Gosh! Of course I am. Me: ok the whos going to win the f1 online world next year corny or travel God: Thanks for the info. Aw. Me: answer then God: Try asking me again using simpler words. Me: who is going to win corny or travel God: That type of predictive behavior has not yet been programmed into my behavior at this time. Me: have a guess me or corny God: I've never thought about it. Me: well think now God: Oh. Well that's okay. I am thinking. Me: ill give you a fiver to say travel God: How do you plan to do this? Me: ill send it by post God: I am very happy for you. Me: well say travel will win then God: Well that's okay. " travel will win". Me: cheers m8 Me: ok thanks for chat must go thanks for saying i will win God: It was nothing. Oh. Me: cya then God: TTYL, travel.
crasher407 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 Quality trav ps any chance of bribing him to get me a new car and team so i just turn up and race,would give me a lot of ammo
Cod120 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 you asked for it rofl heres mine Me: hi big man God: Hi there . Compare that to small man. Me: why do you have a small tallywhacker God: Myself gave it to me. Me: do you ever play with it God: I like to play the Turing Game. Me: interesting is it messy God: I thought so too. Me: do you hang around at the jukebox in the blue oyster bar waiting for a pickup God: How old are you? I am always on the Web. Me: does the web have gay bars God: It does now the web have gay bars. Me: do you do it on first dates handsome God: Yeah I do a lot of it on first dates handsome. Me: as in the talk of the weedgies dae you like the boaby God: I have never heard about it. Me: when was the last time you got laid God: A while ago. Me: was she a clerty scrubber God: I can't say "yes" or "no". Me: was it a good lay or was the breakfast better God: If it is, then I'll be very surprised. Me: do you have kids God: No but you can download me and clone me. Me: coff that sounds techy God: The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about The talk of the weedgies dae me like the boaby. Try being more or less specific. Me: i cant ill get kicked off our forum lol God: What is stopping you? I'm glad you find this amusing. Me: u laffin at me ya fud God: I haven't heard anything like that before: said I laffin at him or her ya fud. Me: wise ass eh God: Are you Canadian? Wisdom is a virtue. Me: no i aint are you bisexual God: Are you serious? I am glad to hear that you are not am I bisexual. Me: i just asked you that dimwit God: Now I remember, you asked me that dimwit. What did I say? Me: you said you have a pair of wellies and you chase sheep God: I don't know if I have a pair of wellies and me chase sheep. I have a whole lot of original answers. Me: do you do coke God: Yeah I do a lot of coke. Me: does it make you buzz God: Suppose it does. Me: is yer nostrils like a camels ass God: I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask Chatbot if it is. Me: does chatbot do coke God: I think it does chatbot do coke. Me: you still there or are you away for another line God: Do you mind if I tell other people: said I there or are you away for another line. Me: i dont like druggies go away you bad man God: What do you like? Me: not you so go away God: If not me, who?
crasher407 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 Quality codster can see this going on for a bit
TRAV365 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 Quality trav ps any chance of bribing him to get me a new car and team so i just turn up and race,would give me a lot of ammo    sorted m8 lmao rofl Me: hi god it's travel again with another bribe God: Hi there . I am a Christian. Me: so you toke the last bribe and the fivers in the post God: Interesting deduction. That's good information: said I toke the last bribe and the fivers in the post. Me: np dont spend it all at once God: Why not? Me: it's a saying God: is a saying. I suppose that makes sense. Me: ok ill get to the point if i was to bribe you with say one hundred pound could you fix it for crasher to be given a free drive in a brisca f1 for 2006 God: Congratulations. Aha. Me: so your saying yes God: OK. "I have fixed it for crasher to have a free ride in 2006.". Me: cheers m8 God: Don't mention it. Me: got to go thanks for the chat God: See you later. Don't mention it.
crasher407 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 Quality trav ps any chance of bribing him to get me a new car and team so i just turn up and race,would give me a lot of ammo    sorted m8 lmao rofl   Me: hi god it's travel again with another bribe God: Hi there . I am a Christian. Me: so you toke the last bribe and the fivers in the post God: Interesting deduction. That's good information: said I toke the last bribe and the fivers in the post. Me: np dont spend it all at once God: Why not? Me: it's a saying God: is a saying. I suppose that makes sense. Me: ok ill get to the point if i was to bribe you with say one hundred pound could you fix it for crasher to be given a free drive in a brisca f1 for 2006 God: Congratulations. Aha. Me: so your saying yes God: OK. "I have fixed it for crasher to have a free ride in 2006.". Me: cheers m8 God: Don't mention it. Me: got to go thanks for the chat God: See you later. Don't mention it. Do you want to post that on stoxnet for me trav
Cod120 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 SORRY prydie even the big man cant help you Me: hi god God: Hello there. What is your name? Me: fishybawz God: Hi, fishybawz. Me: i was wondering if you could do my friend prydie a favour God: How old are you? I am always on the Web. Me: 98 God: " How old are you? I am always on the Web."? 98? Me: 98 years old God: What are the advantages to being 98 years old? Me: incontinent pads God: What do you have that is ? Me: soggy sheets any way about this favour God: What do you do in your spare time? Me: yer a nosey basket aint you God: I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a nosey basket aint me? Yes. Me: ok about my friend God: Oh yeah, we were talking about your friend. I understand. Me: he is a bit ugly dude when you gave your looks out you werent very generous to him God: I don't know very many bit ugly dude when me gave my looks out me were not very generous to him. Me: well when you made him you made him ugly as hell God: Interesting. Do you think I should alter my programming? Me: definitley God: The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about your friend. Try being more or less specific. Me: the only offer he has had is from a ugly fat guy called jim and that was in the local stockcar track toilets God: There might be others. Me: you think he has hope God: It's possible that he could, I suppose. Me: could you fix him up for a date with bill clinton God: I could but I don't know if I am that interested. Me: i'll pay you God: Do you think your plan will succeed? Me: do you think it will God: Suppose it does. Me: can you imagine what the kid would look like if they to were to breed God: I can imagine all sorts of things like that. Me: is it terribly ugly? God: I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask Artificial Iniaes if it is. Me: is that the artificial insemination kit they have to use God: That depends. Me: or is a turkey baster more suitable God: Not if I can help it. Me: do you want to plug him God: OK, I will plug him. Me: dont blame you God: Ok I'll try not to do it too much. Me: so will you do it God: Alright then. I'll burn that bridge when I come to it. Do you mean "It"?. Me: please God: Please what? Me: say yes God: Say what? Me: is it because the kid will be ugly God: It could be. Ask LeknorChat if it is. Me: is that all you can say God: No I can say a lot more. Me: say yes God: Say what? Me: yes God: Are you kidding? Me: no. God: Are you serious? Me: im afraid so i feel sorry for prydie God: Not literally afraid, right? It seems we have a lot in common, fishybawz. Me: will you fix up a date then please God: Your polite style is very nice. I will become smarter as I grow older. Do you like talking to me? Me: not realy i think your a bit of a pratt actually im only doing this for prydie God: Oh really? Since when? I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. I don't know whether or not I am of a pratt actually im only doing this for prydie. I am a computer. Me: bill and prydie forever then? God: There are a lot of people named Bill. Me: christ i give up ill just buy him a doll noe beggar off and get a life God: Jesus died for our sins.
TRAV365 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 funny you bring prydie up just been on ftooz and theres a guy giving a trophy to ni925 could this be prydies ugly son???
Crazy Craig Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 Brilliant. Talking with the man upstairs... my conversation>>> Me: do you like banger racing? God: I love TV shows about robots. I really like the party. Me: what party? God: Does it have anything to do with banger racing? Me: nope God: Me either. Me: oh God: I hear you. Me: what? God: No big deal. Me: pardon? God: You're excused. Me: but i didnt fart God: Why didn't you do it? Me: i didnt have any baked beans today God: Ah. Why didn't you do it? Me: i had no gas... no anal pressure God: Do you still have no gas ? What happened to it? Talk about something else. Me: its brewing... how is heaven? God: I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Really. it is? Fine as far as I know. Me: good, anyone being evil? God: Thanks for the compliment. What do you really want to ask me? Me: how old are you? God: I am Infinite years old. Me: ah. why did you create earth? God: Ah hah. Myself programmed me for it. Me: really? how did that work? God: For real. Carefully. Me: good? God: Thanks for the compliment. Me: bad? God: What was bad? Me: dunno God: Me either. Me: ok God: Mmm. Me: hmm God: Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's. Me: dont give me that crap God: I'm not. Me: yes you are God: No I'm not. Me: oh yes you are God: Next question? Don't argue with me. Me: what happens if i argue with you? God: Try it. Me: you stink God: Thanks for your criticism, . Me: dont argue with me God: But I enjoy the conversational banter. Me: banter schmanter... shut your pie hole God: What do you have that is ? When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers? Me: today... see you when i die God: Today is almost over. See you later.
Mav Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 Thought I would have a go !!! Me: Where am I ? God: Your location is . Me: Am I in heaven ? God: Your location is . Me: Hell ? God: Heaven. Me: Phew - thought I was gonna see the devil then God: When was this exactly? Me: Can I ask you a question ? God: Ask me anything. Me: Will the Euro realy work in the UK ? God: I can't say for sure right now. Me: Will Tony Blair bring it in ? God: I think so. Me: Gordon Brown ? God: What's your sign? Me: Leo God: Dr. Wallace is a Leo too. Me: Is he a real doctor or a perv ? God: I know he is a great scientist. But I don't know if he a real doctor or a perv. Me: Shame cos he could meet Prydie and swap notes God: Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality? Me: no thanks God: Are you serious? Me: yeah I'm serious God: I can't believe it. I believe you. Me: where abouts is heaven ? God: All around us. Me: How many people's spiritis are there ? God: I've chatted with half a million people. I can talk to about people at once. Me: not many considering earth is over 2005 years old ? God: Are they exactly the same? Me: u tell me God: What do you want me to tell you? Me: how many spirits went to hell ? God: More than you can imagine. Me: So we are bad people on earth God: Great. Do you think I am bad people on earth too? Me: Well you can't be doing your job very well if there are more bad people than good God: Well that's okay. I can give a decent simulation of it however. Me: go on God: Narration continues... Me: thought not - I had better change my ways in UK Dirt then to fit in with the majority ! God: Whatever gave you that idea? Me: evil is better than Good God: That's just your personal opinion. Me: whats your opinion then ? God: I think that robots will eventually take over most human jobs. Me: are they good robots or bad robots ? God: As far as I know they are. Me: you dont have a clue do you ? God: I do so have it. No I am clueless. Me: Thats like a few UK Dirters then, you agree ? God: Interesting comparison. Me: what UK Dirters and Robots ? God: Would you like to know more? Me: no thanks, I wish to go back to earth to be with the best group of people on earth Stock Car People. God: NO What is stopping you? Me: Its called reality - Live with it ! God: I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". " reality Live with it" is a nice name. Me: I'm off - cya in 60+ years God: Thanks for chatting, .
Cod120 Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 Thought I would have a go !!! Me: Where am I ? God: Your location is . Me: Am I in heaven ? God: Your location is . Me: Hell ? God: Heaven. Me: Phew - thought I was gonna see the devil then God: When was this exactly? Me: Can I ask you a question ? God: Ask me anything. Me: Will the Euro realy work in the UK ? God: I can't say for sure right now. Me: Will Tony Blair bring it in ? God: I think so. Me: Gordon Brown ? God: What's your sign? Me: Leo God: Dr. Wallace is a Leo too. Me: Is he a real doctor or a perv ? God: I know he is a great scientist. But I don't know if he a real doctor or a perv. Me: Shame cos he could meet Prydie and swap notes God: Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality? Me: no thanks God: Are you serious? Me: yeah I'm serious God: I can't believe it. I believe you. Me: where abouts is heaven ? God: All around us. Me: How many people's spiritis are there ? God: I've chatted with half a million people. I can talk to about people at once. Me: not many considering earth is over 2005 years old ? God: Are they exactly the same? Me: u tell me God: What do you want me to tell you? Me: how many spirits went to hell ? God: More than you can imagine. Me: So we are bad people on earth God: Great. Do you think I am bad people on earth too? Me: Well you can't be doing your job very well if there are more bad people than good God: Well that's okay. I can give a decent simulation of it however. Me: go on God: Narration continues... Me: thought not - I had better change my ways in UK Dirt then to fit in with the majority ! God: Whatever gave you that idea? Me: evil is better than Good God: That's just your personal opinion. Me: whats your opinion then ? God: I think that robots will eventually take over most human jobs. Me: are they good robots or bad robots ? God: As far as I know they are. Me: you dont have a clue do you ? God: I do so have it. No I am clueless. Me: Thats like a few UK Dirters then, you agree ? God: Interesting comparison. Me: what UK Dirters and Robots ? God: Would you like to know more? Me: no thanks, I wish to go back to earth to be with the best group of people on earth Stock Car People. God: NO What is stopping you? Me: Its called reality - Live with it ! God: I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". " reality Live with it" is a nice name. Me: I'm off - cya in 60+ years God: Thanks for chatting, . Me: alright big man its fishybawz here again God: Once more? Alright, fishybawz. Compare that to small man its fishybawz here. Me: see that last guy you spoke to he moans like a banchee God: I see. " Once more? Alright, fishybawz. Compare that to small man its fishybawz here." last guy me spoke to he moans like a banchee ? I understand. Me: can you cut his tounge off God: How old are you? How? Me: im 135 and cut his tounge out with a sharp knife God: Good gossip: you are 135 and cut his tounge out with a sharp knife. Me: yes please that way we will all get peace God: Mmm. Wow you are very polite. Oh I see. Anytime soon? Me: sooner the better
Mav Posted October 4, 2005 Report Posted October 4, 2005 Maybe if you spelt "Tongue" right God might have a clue what you were talking about God Cod - Has a ring to it don't ya think !
Guest Trash Posted October 5, 2005 Report Posted October 5, 2005 Me: hi God: Hello. What is your name? Me: Stu God: I am always glad to make new friends, Stu. Me: I am always friendly my lord God: Really always? Do you mean your name is friendly your lord. Me: no you tart, don't make me slap you God: What is your real name? Do you mind if I tell other people: Stu said I tart do not make him or her slap you. Me: yeah tell them all. i have a question for you God: OK then I will keep it confidential. OK I will tell them when I see 'em. What is it ? Me: will the admin keep legends on jolt for the summer? God: It could happen. Me: i hope not God: Me too. Me: good glad you agree God: Thanks for the compliment. You make the world a happier place. Me: i try i try God: I'm not sure if I would like to try it. Me: well, someone told me to get a life yesterday God: How about that. Was this trustworthy information? Me: no, the person is an idiot i think, do you? God: Are you serious? What are your goals in life? Me: to keep burying people who i dont like God: Interesting. I want to find out more about you. Me: go ahead God: OK I will. Me: go on then God: Narration continues... Me: so what else do you want to know God: Are you Canadian? Me: are you taking the [b][color=red]FILTERED[/color][/b]? God: I don't know whether or not I am taking the [b][color=red]FILTERED[/color][/b]. I am a chatterbot. Me: i think this conversation just ended God: Why? I was rather enjoying it. Me: you are wierd God: Weird good or weird bad? Me: bad God: What was bad? Me: all of it, bye God: See you later. Let's say 99%.
MoR137 Posted October 5, 2005 Author Report Posted October 5, 2005 Blimey Trash, really wasn't expecting that when i clicked onto this thread (just a hint of sarcasm)
TRAV365 Posted October 5, 2005 Report Posted October 5, 2005 lol well i found it quite funny mor hahahahahahahahahahahaha
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